Episode 07 - Merge

Well done!

Give me a breakdown of the overall game dynamic for you right now. Who do you trust in this game, who do you not trust but think you can work with? How do you get from here to the end, and who do you go there with?

How important is that idol, and how do you intend to use it?

I have no idea. I got completely screwed by John being annoying and Brook being an idiot. I have no alliance. I am quite certain everyone will vote me out the first chance they get. And I'm on vacation so I haven't been able to really think about this. But I think I'm screwed. LOL

Brook really sucks. REALLY sucks. We are going to get Pagonged. I'm trying to get back to working with the original Guatusos. They *think* the plan is that they are going to split the votes between me and Gregg tomorrow and if I play the idol, Gregg goes. I don't believe that shit for one second. I think they are probably going to get Chris out. So the big question is...... do I use the idol tomorrow? Do I? I really really have a feeling they are going to try to draw it out of me and then vote out someone else. I could use it on Chris. But I mean..... that just buys us one fucking week and then outs the fact that I am with Chris to everyone. AND they really could be voting for me to go.

It just doesn't make sense. I am no threat at all. I highly doubt I will ever win an IC. No one likes me apparently.... holy shit wait until they see my confessionals. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha But anyway.... why take me out? But then again why did we vote Caryn out tonight? Unless that was just a gimme vote while everyone got organized. And they still have the numbers. But what was the point of voting Caryn out? She's one of the people you WANT to be around at the end. So anything is possible with these people.

I have no idea what I am going to do tomorrow night. But I'm not buying this split the vote between Gregg and Chad plan at all. Not one bit. I'm attempting to get info out of Gregg. Not that that will do a fucking thing because he's a fucking liar. But maybe I can try to pick up on SOMETHING.

The problem with these games..... is you have to play the game with other people. And other people are fucking idiots. Did Brook SERIOUSLY think that he was going to make it after he voted out John? Is Jars of clay lover here? Am I FUCKING playing this game and trying to align with Jars of clay lover?????? Brenda?

It's also funny that it turns out Brook was the one making alliances all over the place on original Guatuso and was most likely the Dolly leak. And Ami was probably more trustworthy than I was giving her credit for. And people really didn't like John. Whatever. You only have to talk to him on a fucking message board for a few weeks. It was really that bad that you had to fuck over 7 people and ensure we do not have the numbers because he was annoying? What?

Unless there is some kind of crazy twist, which I doubt there will be at this point. I'm just playing dead and trying to look as pathetic as humanly possible hoping that buys me a little time.

OK. I just got this PM from Mia:

Okay. We're voting Jolanda. Tom is on board too, because Jolanda is a pretty big threat to all of us. She has a lot of people on her side, but we should be able to get 7 votes for her if you vote with me, Tom, Bobby Jon, Chris, Ami, and Lisa.

Playing the idol is entirely up to you, but it might be useful later, so if you want to take the risk... So yeah, Jolanda it is.

OK what?

I mean Mia is a little flaky... but what?

First of all... Mia somehow successfully convinced Tom to vote out Jolanda, whom he was in a very tight alliance with before the tribes swapped. Just like that?

I wish I could go back to my old PMs and read what BJ and Tom told me about the tribe dynamics on nuChorotega. I just really have an extremely hard time believing that Mia was close enough with Tom to get him to agree to vote out Jolanda. Especially considering Mia was furiously going for immunity in our last tribal challenge like I was so clearly she didn't feel like she was very safe within nuChorotega.

She's a big threat to us all because she has "a lot of people on her side", yet there shouldn't be a problem getting 7 votes to get rid of her? I'm in Jars of clay lover land again here...

I'm pretty sure what this means is there will be 5 votes for Jolanda (that is if Mia isn't the one making this whole nonsensical story up) and 6 votes for Chris. That's what that means.

Chris said that he sent a PM to Jolanda saying that he thought Tom was a big threat and maybe they should vote him out and two minutes later she told Tom. But somehow Tom would prefer to get Jo out over someone like Chris when there is a threat of the old Guatusos banding back together, getting the majority again, and picking them all off? Especially with them knowing I have an idol? No. Not possible.

FUCK. I have no idea what to do. I may have to use the idol on Chris tomorrow night. The Chorotegas will never trust me after what happened over there so it's not like I can work with them. Which means I need a fighting chance to get numbers on my side. But how idiotic would that be if I played the idol on Chris and he wasn't the target or even worse.... I end up getting voted out and this is just an elaborate trick to make me feel safe. And using the idol on him makes it clear that I am working with him. And one of us could be gone right after that. I can keep playing dead, but I need to do something if I want to play for better than 7th place at best.

Oy vey.

Gregg is so full of shit, it's comical. Didn't I write at one point that if he was lying, he was better than me? He's pretty good but now that I know for sure.... it's like Oh puleeeeeeeeeeease brutha.

He won't tell me anything about this vote tomorrow. And he's playing dumb on the splitting the vote between me and him plan which EVERYONE knew about and it wouldn't shock me if he was in on it.

It's time for me to go to bed. I have no frigging idea what I am going to do about all of this.