Episode 09

Was that what you were expecting? Who do you trust now?

Once you have time to mull it over, what's your plan to recover? How can you secure your safety?

Do you regret playing the idol on yourself? How do you think things would be different if you'd have played it on Chris, as discussed a bit before?

My plan to recover is to make it absolutely known that I am alone. Which is why I didn't vote tonight. That's all I got. Fuck I can't believe they still voted for Chris. I was hoping I convinced them that I knew Chris was voting and they voted for me instead.

Do you regret playing the idol on yourself? How do you think things would be different if you'd have played it on Chris, as discussed a bit before?

I can't regret it. I tried to make a move. It didn't work. Oh well. Now I'm just hoping that now they know I don't have one.... I'm not a threat.

Did my actions tonight work? Meaning the not voting thing? And the playing the idol? People from Chorotega who hadn't spoken to me since we merged are now sending me PMs basically asking me what the deal is and if I'm a free agent and stuff..... I'm not going to get excited just yet. But hmmm..... Also I have to stop fucking talking to Gregg. Although I'm hoping because he thinks he can easily manipulate me and I'm some kind of dumbass that he *may* convince some of the others to keep me around a bit. At some point they are going to have to start eating their own. Right? RIGHT????

I'm so fucked.

Oh and BTW.... I had no intention whatsoever of even attempting to win immunity tonight. Not saying I could have. But my sucking at challenges is going to be a big strategy of mine. Yea.... I'm that pathetic.

And I really really really really want to kick Brook in the nutsack. For the record.

Oh and BTW..... Kim told me she was so frustrated after Clue 9 on the idol clues she gave up. 9? 9? Was that a typo or did she let something slip? Clue 9 definitely lends weight to my theory that John was giving the idol clues to Tom and Tom was taking additional clues and he has the idol. Doesn't it?

I need to stop this because it's going to drive me batty. I am playing dead. I'm an observer. Consider me one of the lurkers. I have to stop playing this game for at least a couple of days.

Wait.... The jury can't read our confessionals right?

No, only if we send them something specific. Which is not often.

Talk me through the reasoning for the lack of a vote last night. i am confused how that is supposed to buy you credit with either side. Seems to me it is more likely to make your stock drop on both sides.

Whoops no, I'm still thinking of lurkers. Who we send snippets to.

The Jury can't see anything but what goes on in public, and talk between themselves.

No, only if we send them something specific. Which is not often.

Talk me through the reasoning for the lack of a vote last night. i am confused how that is supposed to buy you credit with either side. Seems to me it is more likely to make your stock drop on both sides.

Now you're making me think it was the wrong move..... I said I was going to play like a lunatic.

Here was the thinking:

There was a really high probability that BJ and Tom were playing Mia, Ami, and Chris and they were not voting for Jolanda to go home. I don't know why Ami, Mia, and Tom could not see this. However, if they weren't playing them, it was not to be known that the old Guatusos had banded back together as a group of five because then they CLEARLY would not go for it. Chris fucked any chance of that up by telling them he had me wrapped around his finger and I was going to use the idol on him but whatever... I was playing confused and dumb and asking all the Chorotegas who they were voting out and they would all give me different answers. So I was playing the poor me I'm out of the loop and I have no idea what is going on with this vote card. And I even said to Gregg, who I am certain tells everyone what I say to him) that I was probably not going to vote because no one was talking to me and I wasn't going to randomly piss off someone by voting for them blindly. And I knew there was a big chance of Jolanda staying, so I didn't want to vote for her as a sign of good faith that I was not gunning for her and really did want to work with her. And if Tom and BJ weren't lying and were going to vote her out, they didn't need my vote anyway. And if I voted with them for Jolanda, it would have alerted them to the fact that the 5 Guatusos were in fact working together. The only group that it probably hurt me with was the Guatusos, but if Jolanda went, they would have to stick with me anyway for numbers. And Mia also clearly said I had to pretend I wasn't with them. And if Jolanda didn't go, it doesn't matter if the Guatusos don't trust me . We're all dead men/women.

Also, if what I wanted to happen had happened and they voted for me thinking I was going to use the idol on Chris, it still wouldn't look like I was firmly with the original Guatusos and we could use that to our advantage.

It's part of my lone wolf strategy, hoping I make it farther then Ami, Mia, and Lisa and then they all realize they need to turn on each other and try to use me as a swing vote. It's all I got. When you go into a merge down by two, there's not a whole helluva lot you can do. I'M TRYING.

So it looks like Ami is going next but they are worried about an idol. My plan must have worked a little bit because at least they are talking to me. "They" being the Chorotegas. BJ sent me all these messages last night trying to befriend me and get info out of me. He said he wanted to vote out Jolanda and would I do it or would I not vote again. I told him as long as people tell me what to do, I will vote with the majority and that I am all alone in this game and I am up for anything. And Jolanda is hounding me about who could potentially have the idol from nuChorotega. So it looks like they are going to vote Ami out, but they are scared she has an idol. I don't believe for one second that BJ was literally asking me if I would vote Jolanda out because he wants her gone. He has the votes without me if that's what he wants to do. I thought at first that he may see if I would be willing to join his "side" when it gets to the point that they have to split. I want that to happen. I want them both to think that because once it gets to the six of them, they are split 3/3. I want to be number 4. I also put a seed in Tom's head that I hate Gregg. And then on the other side, Jolanda is actually talking to me again and I'm giving her info on who I think may have the idol from nuChorotega. If I had to bet money, it's either Mia or Tom. Probably Mia.

One thing I do think is I'm not the target tonight because they KNOW I don't have an idol and they are trying to get info out of me. Unless they are going to just vote me out, but from what they are sending me, trying to get info out of me and befriend me, it doesn't seem that way. I could totally be wrong about that and they are trying to get info and play nice before they send me to jury, but that's really not what I think. I think that both BJ and Gregg/Jo may be trying to pull me in to be their fourth vote when they need it. I hope that's what is happening.

BJ even said to me in a PM that the other "side" (Jolanda, Gregg, Ibe) were throwing my name out but he was going to convince them it was stupid to vote me out and that he wouldn't vote for me.

I mean do they really think I don't see through all of this shit????

Maybe I am going tonight..... I have no idea. Oh well. If I go, I'll hang out in the jury and talk to Brook, Chris, and Caryn. Ugghh. Ugghh Ugghh.

OK. So both Jolanda and BJ have told me that the other "side" wants to vote me out, but they are trying to fix it and campaign for me to stay. There are three possible scenarios for this:

1. They really are voting me out, but they are trying to obtain my jury vote.
2. They really are voting Ami out, but want to make it look like it's me so Ami doesn't use her idol if she has it.
3. They really are voting Ami out, and making it look like they saved me so that I will work with their "side"

I hope it's number 3.

It appears that it is actually #2. Jolanda is telling me it's me because they are terrified of an idol being played. But they are probably voting out Lisa. Which makes sense because she definitely does not have an idol. And the more of us they can pick off, the greater ability they have to split the vote in case Mia and Ami do have an idol.

Now I just have to convince them that I will vote with them and I don't care if Ami and Mia go. So they don't pick me off to ensure they can split 3/3 and not get idoled by one of them. Tom seems to tell me the truth. He told me about the Tom vote off last night and didn't try to play games like the others did. He told me that they are really voting off Lisa tonight. So I will vote Lisa. Mia is like threatening me to vote for Jolanda or something. Whatever Mia. I'm not playing with you anymore. Sorry. Tom could be lying to me and they are voting off Ami, but whatever. My vote for Lisa will prove I am voting with them and hopefully they keep me here until F7 when they are going to need me. If they really are split 3/3 which it kind of sounds like they are.

My goal is for right now each "side" to think that I will do what they want. So they both want to keep me to F7 and hopefully use me as a 4th when they need it and have to start eating their own.

I hope this works.

I just realized that Ami is probably trying to step into the role that I want with her other nuGuatusos. I have to make sure that doesn't happen. I have to convince Tom and BJ that I will vote with them and I hate Jo/Ibe/Gregg for all the lying they did to me. And I am much less of a threat than Ami is from a challenge perspective.

If I stay tonight I need to scramble a bit because I need to make it farther than Ami and Mia to secure my swing vote status. I think. Or the 3/3 split could also not exist. I have to try though, right?

It appears that it is actually #2. Jolanda is telling me it's me because they are terrified of an idol being played. But they are probably voting out Lisa. Which makes sense because she definitely does not have an idol. And the more of us they can pick off, the greater ability they have to split the vote in case Mia and Ami do have an idol.

Now I just have to convince them that I will vote with them and I don't care if Ami and Mia go. So they don't pick me off to ensure they can split 3/3 and not get idoled by one of them. Tom seems to tell me the truth. He told me about the Tom vote off last night and didn't try to play games like the others did. He told me that they are really voting off Lisa tonight. So I will vote Lisa. Mia is like threatening me to vote for Jolanda or something. Whatever Mia. I'm not playing with you anymore. Sorry. Tom could be lying to me and they are voting off Ami, but whatever. My vote for Lisa will prove I am voting with them and hopefully they keep me here until F7 when they are going to need me. If they really are split 3/3 which it kind of sounds like they are.

My goal is for right now each "side" to think that I will do what they want. So they both want to keep me to F7 and hopefully use me as a 4th when they need it and have to start eating their own.

I hope this works.

I totally muffed this up. TOM told me that Jolanda lied to me and said that I was the target and was trying to save me so that I don't tell one of the others who they are really voting for, hoping they don't use their idol. Jolanda is feeding me a pile of dog shit as usual. But I'm playing along like I am her BFF. I need Gregg and Jolanda to think that I am their friend and would vote with them against Tom/Kim/BJ. And I want Tom/Kim/BJ to think the same thing. Tom is lying to Mia and telling me the truth. That's gotta count for something. And BJ hasn't sent me one PM since the merge and he was all buddy buddy with me last night. I'm going to make a move in a little bit with Tom. And then after the vote tonight (if I'm still here, which I can't imagine why I wouldn't be at this point there is no purpose in lying to me) send Jolanda a huge THANK YOU for saving me and chat it up with Gregg again (which the thought of that invokes my gag reflex) but I have to do what I have to do here..... It's my only possible chance in this game. I just need to make sure Ami doesn't beat me to it.

icon_lol I don't get why they think that you screwed them over, because all that happened was the vote was 6-4 instead of 6-5.. And they also think that all of NuChorotega is voting Jolanda together, so in their minds it should be 6-3 in their favor even if you don't vote. I mean don't get me wrong, it's nice to always vote just because you never know, but I think it's funny that they almost seem to feel more betrayed by your no-vote than by my vote against Chris.

Yeah, it definitely could have been you since it does seem like you don't have any real allies. But frankly, in my mind that doesn't make you a threat (no offense.) It makes you an potential asset if I can show that I want to work with you. And as "fun" as it would be to just tell you a name every round until Jo and them wanted to vote for you, I actually have something else in mind.

How would you feel about working with me in this game for the long term? Because the truth is, I'm not so sure Lisa WILL go home tonight, because I'm not so sure I want to vote for her. Bobby Jon and I agreed before the last vote that we wanted to switch back if people didn't feel too betrayed, and our big thing was that we really did start to fear Chris for all of his shit stirring he had done since the merge. We're also trying to get Kim with us as well, but she isn't really as tight and if she voted Jo I think it would only be to vote with the majority. So if we do flip, I expect Bobby Jon and I to take a lot of heat, and I wouldn't be surprised if Ami-Lisa-Mia are still very wary of us after our Chris votes. So my proposition is that I would like to work with you. I could be an obvious target if I vote Jo tonight (and truthfully I plan to vote Jo right now) and from there I wouldn't be surprised if some scheme was concocted against myself and Bobby Jon in the future. But I don't think people would suspect you of working with me at all, and if that happened I would want to go far with you. One reservation Bobby Jon has about flipping is that the four Old Guatuso members will try to band back together in two rounds, but I think I would be able to trust you to work with me past then.

Tell me how you feel about all of that, and if you are up for forming this alliance. Obviously we would keep it quiet, but that could help us to eventually take a power position on this tribe and make sure that we're in here for the long haul.

So suck on that Brenda! I knew if one of these people were smart, they would take advantage of my "I'm all alone" stuff.

Oh and it's funny. I logged in to send a "let me lay this all out for you" message and he beat me to it. I ain't dead yet.

Now I just have to figure out if this does happen, how to play this right. I may actually have a shot at the finals here!!!

lol, my impartiality here means I wasn't criticising it. I'm just having trouble understanding the logic behind it. I get it now, but it's just not a way I think I could play. We will talk more postgame where it's not influencing your processes.